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Top Ten Signs You Spoil Your Dog:

1. You think begging for table scraps is beneath him, so you let your
dog eat at the table with you.

2. You take him to the supermarket and let him
pick out his own dog food.

3. Your husband comes home from work, looks at the stew on the
stove and asks: "Is this people food or dog food?"

4. You bought matching His & Hers place mats for your dog and
yourself.

5. At dinner parties you always have to double-check the butter for
visible lick marks, before putting it on the table.

6. Your dog gets to vote on where to spend the
next family vacation.

7. You don't care if you or your spouse are comfortable at night, as
long as Fido has enough room on the bed.

8. You complain about the rising costs of groceries, but you don't
think twice about spending a fortune on doggie treats.

9. Your dog always gets the best spot on the couch and sometimes
he even gets to hold the remote.

10. He has his own e-mail address.










Is That Your Rottweiler?

A man walks into a bar one day and asks, "Does anyone here own
that rottweiler outside?"

"Yeah, I do!" a biker says, standing up. "What about it?"

"Well, I think my chihuahua just killed him..."

"What are you talkin' about?!" the biker says, disbelievingly.
"How could your little runt kill my rottweiler?"

"Well, it seems he got stuck in your dog's throat!




<DIV style="PADDING-RIGHT: 10px; PADDING-LEFT: 10px; BACKGROUND: url(/gfx/petpictxtbg.gif) repeat-y 0% 50%; PADDING-BOTTOM: 0px; PADDING-TOP: 0px; TEXT-ALIGN: center; moz-background-clip: initial; moz-background-origin: initial; moz-background-inline-policy: initial">
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<DIV style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold" align=center>"Cross-eyed Rottweiler"</DIV>
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<DIV align=left>A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet. "My dog's cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him?"

"Well," says the vet, "let's have a look at him." So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then checks his teeth. Finally, he says </DIV>
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<DIV align=left>"I'm going to have to put him down."

"What? Because he's cross-eyed?"

"No, because he's really heavy." </DIV>
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<DIV align=left>Two boys are playing hockey on the pond on Boston Common, when one is attacked by a vicious Rottweiler.

Thinking quickly, the other boy took his hockey stick and managed to wedge it down the dog's collar and twist, luckily breaking the dog's neck and stopping its attack.

A reporter who was strolling by sees the incident, and rushes over to interview the boy.

"Young Bruins Fan Saves friend from Vicious Animal..." he starts writing in his notebook.

"But, I'm not a Bruins Fan," the little hero replied.

"Sorry, since we're in Boston, I just assumed you were," said the reporter and starts again.

"Red Sox Fan Rescues Friend from Horrific attack..." he continued writing in his notebook.

"I'm not a Red Sox fan either!" The boy said.

"I assumed everyone in Boston was either for the Bruins or the Red Sox. So, what team do you root for?" the reporter asked.

"I'm a Yankees fan!" the child beamed. The reporter starts a new sheet in his notebook and writes:

"Little Bastard from New York Kills Beloved Family Pet."
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<DIV align=left ="neighbours">http://www.thehumorarchives.com/humor/0001182.html</DIV></DIV>
 

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I think of this one every time I see Elwood and Bobber playing.


Is That Your Rottweiler?

A man walks into a bar one day and asks, "Does anyone here own
that rottweiler outside?"

"Yeah, I do!" a biker says, standing up. "What about it?"

"Well, I think my chihuahua just killed him..."

"What are you talkin' about?!" the biker says, disbelievingly.
"How could your little runt kill my rottweiler?"

"Well, it seems he got stuck in your dog's throat!
 
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